A fella goes for a quick round of golf, and at the first tee, someone is about to tee off in front of him. The man takes a brand new ball out of his bag, unwraps it and places it on the tee. Thwack! Slices into the trees. "Bollocks!'' He reaches into his bag and takes out another brand new ball, unwraps it, and tees it up. Thwack! Hooks it miles into the bushes. "Bollocks!'' He stomps back to his bag for another ball, when the man waiting approaches him. "Er, excuse me, but I notice you're losing a lot of brand new balls. Why don't you use an old one?'' He looks at the man. "Cos I've never bloody had one!''