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What is the difference between a woman in church and a woman in a bathtub? One has hope in her soul, the other has soap in her hole!
How do you fit an elephant into a SAFEWAY bag? You take the s out of safe and the F out Way. (There is no F-in' way.)
What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A Mega-sore-ass.
What has 6 balls and fucks you twice a week? The Lottery!
What's the difference between a tire and 365 condoms? - Well, one's a Goodyear, and the other's an excellent year! :)
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