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carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same
neighborhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route
he was greeted by the whole family there, who roundly and
soundly congratulated him and sent him on his way with a tidy
gift envelope.
At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars.
The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific
fishing lures.
At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly
beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the
hand, gently led him through the door (which she closed behind
him), and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew
his mind with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.
When he had had enough they went downstairs, where she fixed him a
giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles,
and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied
she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he
noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom
edge.
"All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but
what's the dollar for?"
"Well," she said, "last night, I told my husband that today would
be your last day, and that we should do something special for
you. I asked him what to give you. He said, 'F*ck him. Give
him a dollar.' The breakfast was my idea."
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