• Some Interesting Thoughts *

I asked my wife why there were so many dings on the driver's side of her Mercedes and she said the brakes must be bad on that side. In the bookstore the other day, I saw a book entitled "Sex for Dummies" Why would someone want to teach dumb people how to reproduce? Aren't there enough of them on the roads now?
After you lose an election, will they let you back into all the exclusive clubs you resigned from?
This is the only place in the country where people pull over and stop for a funeral, but speed up to cut off an ambulence or a firetruck. I went out today and bought everything I've been wanting, because now that the elections are over, I know that the politicians are going to take care of the middle class.
The best advice for teenagers is, leave home now while you still know everything.
I really feel sorry for Madonna's baby, having to grow without a last name.
Is it a law of nature that women have to sneeze as soon as they apply their mascara?
The two biggest problems in America are making ends meet and making meetings end.


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