Q: Have you heard about Michael Jackson's New Book?
           A: It's called, "The In's and Out's of Child Rearing
           Q: What's brown and in a baby's diaper?
           A: Michael Jackson's hand !!

       A baby seal walks into a bar and sits down. "What can I get you?"
       asked the bartender.
       "Anything but a Canadian Club" replied the seal.

      A pony walks into a bar and says "Bartender, may I have a drink?"
      Bartender says "What? I can't hear you, speak up!"
      "May I please have a drink?"
      "What? You have to speak up!"
      "Could I please have a drink?"
      "Now listen, if you don't speak up I will not serve you."
      "I'm sorry, I'm just a little hoarse."

            A chicken walks into a bar.
            The bartender says "We don't serve poultry!"
            The chicken says "That's OK I just want a drink."

      A man and giraffe walk into a bar and get totally faceless drunk.
      The giraffe passes out and man gets up to leave.
      Barman says "You can't leave that lying there."
      Man says "It's not a lion it's a giraffe."

Q: What has a woman got in common with a box of Kentucky Fried Chicken?

1. Once you get past the tender breast and the juicy thigh, all you're left with is a greasy box.